"Faith Will See Us Through"

I really don't have anything to report that has to do with the title of this blog but I just liked it.  I have this saying on my livingroom wall...and it says it all in times of happiness and trials!  But this weekend was a good weekend for us.  A lot of activities which usually sends a child with FASD over board...but Dani handled it really well.  I think I found the combination or the secret to calming her down...it's talking in softer tones when there is so much activity and putting her in charge or something...anything.  We spent the day Saturday at her niece's first soccer game of the season and then we all went down to Salt Lake to the aquarium.  I put her in charge of watching her little niece and follow her, make sure she didn't get into any trouble and Dani did a wonderful job.  I am proud of her.  But by the end of the day she was pretty exhausted.  But she was a champ...proud of her!

Shopping with FASD...Oh My!

Have you ever tried going shopping, for yourself, with your child or teen who has FASD?  I forgot what it was like, it's been awhile, only because by the time I get home from work, I am totally exhausted.  Well tonight I had a little extra energy and decided to go to a couple of places.  Laying out the plans and expectations with Danielle.  Ok, we're off to a good start, but while I am looking around she comes up to me and asks about taxes.  Ok, harmless question, no problem.  Then minutes later she starts with the compulsive thinking and saying over and over again, not in rapid succession but within minutes of each statement..."I just need to save up for five weeks and I can get this!"  And then the next store, she found something else to fixate on, and then the same statements begins again.  By the time we get home I am mentally exhausted.  Then the bomb shell...right before she goes to bed...

"Mom...can I ask you a question?"

"Sure honey, what is it?"

"Can I have a raise in my allowance?"

"Why, what's up honey?"

"I want to get those things I saw tonight"  

So I told her I had to think about it and figure out how much is a good raise.  She said she wanted $10 a week, again I told her I would have to think on it.  So...I guess I will go think about it!

Happy Easter!

Today was a good day for my family.  Started with the traditional Easter breakfast consisting of pancakes, bacon, strawberries, orange juice for the adults and special juice drinks for the grandkids.  There were special baskets for the granddaughters, Dani got a new Easter dress (which she looks gorgeous in) and I got some important time with my family.  Couldn't ask for better times.  Then my daughter Brenna and her husband Jason went home for the Easter Bunny to hide the eggs, went there for the hunt.  Fun times.  Then Dani and I went out to dinner, we both didn't feel up to cooking and my husband is in California for a delivery.  Then we laid back all day.  Good day...no problems...no complaints!  Hope everyone's day was good too~

Frustrated Mom!

Here's a question...how do we know, as parents, what is really the actions of the disability or is it really being a teenager?  I have been faced lately with blatant lying.  There are times I don't know how to handle it and there are days I rationalize that this is the FASD that is speaking loud and clear.  Today we had a melt down, she had lied to me twice, things that are important to me and then we got into a huge argument that ended in her tears and crying that she hates herself, she hates the color of her skin, she has a big nose, that she hates coming from two different colored parents and wishes her life was different.  I got out my photo album out and we looked at the pictures of her growing up, from the time she became my daughter, she looked at the pictures of her and her sisters and she realized that her skin is just like her sisters.  And so our conversation came to a conclusion that she has gotten too involved in trying to be too much like her girlfriends at school, with all the make up and stuff, she gave me her make up and we are going back to basics and she is going to look for that girl that came out of the State Hospital a couple of years ago...we will see how it goes.

Time to Catch-Up!

Whew!!!!  What a whirl-wind of activities, doctor's appointments, drama with Danielle, a wonderful visit from my daughter in California.  Finished another six week course of "From Hope to Recovery" that I co-teach, each time I am finished with the class, I learn something more and I meet the most amazing people.  Parents like all of us who have children with similar to different disabilities.  So many parents who are out there crying out for help and mainly for information, especially when these kids turn 15 and time is a ticking away to get them ready for the big 18.  Where are the resources, who do they call, what steps are there to take.  I did what I could do, give what information I have and I am still trying to get things together.

Now I have another situation, dealing with Dani's school.  I have never been so livid in my life!!!! Dani has a cell phone that has a GPS on it so I can keep track of her as she walks home (I'm at work during this time). She took it out of her back-pac and the teacher thought she was texting, which she wasn't because she doesn't have that capability on her phone. To make a long story short, they would not give it back to her, even after I emailed her resource teachers, talked with the vice principle, etc. Their policy is a parent needs to come to school to pick it up. So I told them someone better be there when I get there after 5pm. I raised holy "hell".  I emailed a long letter to the principle, vice principle and all her teachers that because of one teachers poor judgement they were putting my daughter in harms way, especially a daughter who does not have good judgement and who is impulsive.  Then I get a call from the principle himself.  He was standing by their policy and not going to budge and I said "what is to protect my daughter as she walks home today? If something happens to her I am personally holding the school accountable". Another long story short, the school police officer took her home and I had to come after work to get her phone.  I was ready to go to the school district...and I still might.

The picture above are my daughters and my granddaughters in Salt Lake.  From left to right, Granddaughter Kaitlyn, my oldest daughter Brenna, granddaughter Kyla, Dani and my other daughter Ashley.  My newest granddaughter was in the stroller next to me. 

Sorry for the Absence...

I am so sorry I've been absence for a little bit.  Not only with the birth of my third granddaughter, but issues with Danielle (what else is new) and a major flare up with my fibromyalgia.  It hurts to type and believe it or not my day job is nothing but typing.  I am seeing a pain management doctor and we are trying different meds and right now I am so tired and sleepy that it is hard for me to function.  Last week, I came home from work, walked into the house, sat down next to my wonderful husband and instantly fell asleep.  How romantic is that?  So our rolls in my house change.  If I am not taking care of Dani...she is taking care of me and making sure I get my meds, rest and food.  She is a great care-taker.  I don't like it, I don't want her in that roll but it is appreciated.  So forgive me if it is a few days, a week or so between my posts.  I am still hear, I still care and I love you all!

Aunt Danielle!

Yesterday...Sunday...at 4:40pm, my oldest daughter gave birth to her third daughter.  She weighed 8lbs 7oz, 21 inches long.  Her name is Kamryn Aubrie and Aunt Dani is in love with this new little spirit.  You can see it in her face!