Sunday, January 22, 2012

The Rules have Changed...

You would think that after 17 years of being my daughter's mother I would have learned by now that the rules of life change on a annual or a semi-annual or even on a daily basis.  This is the case with my daughter. Since she has been home from the proctor-foster care experience, her anxiety has gotten worse.  Come to find out that for many, many years she has suffered with sensory integration.  This would definitely explain the need to always wear a pair of panty hose or two pairs of pants everyday. 

Anyway, trying to help her transition back into full time high school has been impossible.  She can not handle the large crowds and confusion that comes with all the kids walking to classes and all the conversations, she has sensory overload to where she has panic attacks. For over a week I could not get her up to go to school and her school psychologist suggested I keep her home and ask for hospital services.  That is where a teacher would come to our home to teach her the core classes.  Hence begins my battle with our school district.  Instead of them spending money for what my daughter needs and we were so close to the end of the semester, I picked up work from her teachers that Dani could complete at home, at her own pace and return to be graded.  And it was agreed upon to grade her only on the work she completed.  That worked out pretty good.  Dani was more relaxed, less anxiety attacks, but being home brought on a new set of problems...getting use to being home all the time with the realization that the TV would not be on all the time.  That part is still being worked on...anyway...during this time I discovered that the wrong IQ test was administered to her last year, which brought her IQ up in the mid 80's when her IQ for years and years have been in the low-mid 70's.  And the reason this was of major importance is that I was trying to get Dani into the LifeSkills class, less number of kids, less stress, etc.  But because of the results of the wrong test, my request had been denied.  Then after all the years of working closely with the special education department heads and teachers, I get this comment from one of the coordinators at the school district saying "What makes Dani so special now?"  After that comment I saw "RED"! Our school psychologist re administered the correct test to Dani which brought her IQ where it has been, and I could have taken this case further up the school board but by this time I am totally frazzled and exhausted.  So, here is what we decided to do...

I have officially taken Dani out of school for her core classes, she does to go high school for two classes and they are to be fun classes.  Right now it's peer tutoring and art.  Then I am home-schooling her for the remainder of the year.  Ask me if I know what I am doing...oh heck no!  But it's mainly to decompress, step back from all the stress and focus on those things that are important to a kid like Dani.  My main focus will be in her reading skills and life skills.  Years ago, my husband and I had our own trucking company and we drove all over the United States while home-schooling Dani in our big-rig.  During that time her IQ was up in the 80's.  We had decided to have me stay home so Dani could go to school for the socialization but what I didn't know then that I know now is that her lack of social skills/ques is from the FASD not because of potential sheltering.   But the funny thing is that when she went back into the public school system, her IQ dropped down to the low-mid 70's.  I guess that would show that there is something wrong in the public school systems.  Go figure!

So now since the rules have changed, my husband and I have our work cut out for us, but not so bad...this will be fun!  Danielle is one of those kids that learns from her environment not  books or lectures so we are excited to watch her blossom.

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