Tuesday, May 26, 2009

"I Will"

I will never have the child I dreamed of adopting
But I do have the child
God planned for me to adopt.
So I will adopt new dreams
For my family and daughter.

I will never be able to be the mom I wanted to be.
But I am “her” mom
So I will be the mom she needs.

I will never have a “normal” day – one without meds,
Doctor appointments, therapy, IEP meetings.
But I do have normal moments.
So I will learn to savor the moments
And take each day as it comes.

I will never be able to assume my daughter can
Follow the simple rules, act appropriately, understand the
Consequences of her actions, or be safe.
But I can surround her with a support system
Who will think for her, remind her of the rules
And consequences, and keep her safe.
So I will be her external brain.

I will never know what my daughter could have been.
But I can celebrate the wonder of who she is and what she will
So I will give her all the love, support, encouragement
And the tools she will need
To become a productive adult.

I will never be able to change the fact that
The birth mother drank during her pregnancy.
But I can forgive.
So I will not condemn, pass judgment or hate her.

I will never know a bigger joy than watching my daughter master a new goal,
Remember a rule, or sleep thru the night.
But I can lower my expectations of them and myself.
So I will celebrate with my daughter every mountain climbed
And hurdle crossed.

I will never have a day that is not wholly consumed with the results of a
Woman who drank during pregnancy. But I can raise the community’s
Awareness, education and support of this totally preventable birth defect.

So I will…
So I will…

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